I love reading successful people’s stories. You can learn so much by observation, and books are a delightful peek into the mysterious realm of how other people live. Case in point, yesterday I was finishing up the book #Girlboss by Sophia Amoruso, and one quote in particular jumped out at me:
“If you start out with the finish line in mind, you miss all the fun stuff along the way.”
I love this. Mostly because I am so very bad at it. If you know me in person, you know that once I want to accomplish something, I a) don’t stop until it’s done and b) want it done RIGHTNOW.
The funny thing is, I didn’t even fully recognize this ‘head down, full speed ahead’ tendency in myself until I was talking to my mom about something that I wanted to happen and it just wasn’t happening in the timeframe that I wanted it to. She made the comment “yep, you always did want things to happen exactly how you want it to happen.”
Eye-opening. Thought-provoking. Slightly troublesome. But overall a necessary realization for my self-improvement.
Being goal oriented and bull-headed is not necessarily an all negative thing. If something needs to get done, and it’s not all smooth sailing, you want a little bit of stubborn ‘oh HELL no’ in you. Knowing that you will do whatever it takes to accomplish a task is a valuable asset, and those are the type of people you want by your side when the going gets tough.
However, this trait has a tendency to seep into other areas of life where it is not so helpful. For me, this is relationships. When I know what I want out of a relationship, be it romantic, a friendship, or a work partnership, I fully expect these possibilities to be realized with little to no delay.
And this, friends, is where the negative side of this FULLSTEAMAHEAD personality rears its ugly head. It’s all well and good to know what you want out of YOUR life and YOUR goals, but when there are other people involved, they need to be taken into consideration too.
People are tricky. Push them too much, and they withdraw. Give them too much space, and they leave you behind. Finding the correct balance between the two extremes is always hard, and what makes it harder is that you might find the right ratio for one person, and then another person comes along who is completely different.
Knowing your personal expectations and why you have those expectations is a good way to start off any sort of relationship or journey towards a goal. If you are putting in the honest, sincere effort to make sure you are making headway towards what you want, and that effort is being reciprocated or shown to be getting results, relax on the timeline. It will get there if it’s meant to get there.
Many times we succumb to society’s ideals of what a journey should look like or when we should reach a certain destination. Females especially are susceptible to this pitfall. If you are making progress towards a goal, a life desire, or even simply just having fun, you are doing it right.
The concept of the journey along the way being the ‘fun stuff’ is such a valuable mindset to have. Life IS experience. If you are experiencing things, you are living! There are so many different paths to chose, and choosing the path should be equally as exciting as reaching the end of the path.
However, you should not be experiencing the same things over and over. One of my friends on Facebook posted a live video today talking about how we need to add drama (the good kind) to our lives so that we can have a bomb story at the end of our life adventure. This is such an awesome point–who likes to hear about people who are boring? Not me.
The journey towards your destination IS the drama, IS the fun stuff, IS your life. How many times have you heard someone’s story and thought wow, that is really awesome. I want to do something like that.
You can. Absolutely, totally, 100%.
Everyone needs aspirations. Everyone needs something to strive for. Everyone needs to take the necessary steps to improve themselves. And in the end, all people should be able to point to something concrete and say “I did that.”
But…the fun part is HOW you did it.
The fact that you are here, in 2017, in the exact body and location that you were given is mind-boggling if you really think about it. Take advantage of it–make your life just as crazy, if not more so, than the chances of you being you. Because when it comes down to brass tacks, there’s really no other option.
And so, without further ado…