If I'm going to be completely honest, I feel like I've been stripped down to the brass tacks of who I am as a person, and I am NOT liking the feeling of having to start over from scratch. I mean, I'm 30 years old, for god's sake!
No matter how you say it, the concept of keeping up with society's expectations has forever been a a sticking point with free spirits and a never-ending hamster wheel for devotees.
Robert Frost tells us that the road less traveled makes all the difference. So many people nod sagely at the Greats when they tell us to be daring, be bold, seize the day! Yet when it comes to actually doing so, throats are cleared, feet shift uncomfortably, and no one actually makes a move.
Each and every time you fuck up should be a time where you learn. If you're applying the knowledge gained from when you screw up, it will be very rare that you make the same mistake twice. A flaw-free live is completely impossible, as much as the A-type personalities of the world wish it were so. However, a life lived with integrity and purpose is as close as we can get. Don't allow your missteps to prevent you from finishing your path, and don't allow your dirty shins and skinned knees to give you permission to sit down and throw up your hands.
Sometimes, we may look at someone and feel like they have their shit 100% together and they don't struggle with anything because they are always following through with what they set out to do. Nothing could be further from the truth. There are some days where I go to the gym and my ENTIRE BRAIN is screaming at me to turn around and hightail it back home. Hell, even tonight I didn't want to write a blog post, but because I try to post every Tuesday and Saturday (barring anything unforeseen), I opened my laptop and started typing.
In my previous schools, if you were able to get the kids to behave and respect you and also learn something along the way, that was enough to get you through (not to mention middle school is less rigorous than high school). I have my relationship building tools with my kids down pat, but I have not yet had a chance to really test my actual TEACHING capabilities with kids who are, shocker, eager to learn.
No matter what you need to set in place for yourself in order to feel accomplished and continually grow, the fact remains that there does need to be some regularity held sacred in order for the benefits of routine to be the most potent.
If you don't have health, your quality of life sucks. I don't care if you have ten million dollars in the bank; if you don't have the ability to do what you want, when you want because of hangups with your health, you don't have anything. For some people, money is the barrier to their desires, but that can always be earned. Once you lose your health, you cannot buy it back.